I try to be not so picky but sometimes I can't help it. My husband was watching me check out stuff on Facebook, he noticed that my ex is listed as an uncle...... he says "Really, I thought I was their uncle" Goes to show that sometimes people get hurt. That really irks me.
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One last thought that occured to me this morning... and then I'm done, I promise. Please please PLEASE keep in mind this is not to discount Steve's feelings in anyway. Just another perspective to consider.
I think the thing about this whole situation that hurt the most is that I can distinctly remember a time when you had familiar feelings towards people who aren't "technically" your family. I'm sure you remember when Grandma Howard was grieving, and you wouldn't hesitate to call her "Mom." It just never would have occured to you to tell her that you love her "as a friend." Because you didn't! You loved her as a daughter. Or daughter-in-law, I suppose. And now that time has moved us on, you could say those feelings are no longer appropriate. She's gone and we miss her, and you've been married to Steve and have grown to love his mom as your own, too.
However, sometimes, time has nothing to do with it. How would you feel if someone said you shouldn't be calling Tifani your neice because your sister signed a piece of paper saying so? Again, it just wouldn't occur to you! We love her as family because she IS and no amount of paperwork would ever change that.
So yes, who you were may not be who you are, but it's still part of how you got here. It's important to nurture and grow our newer relationships, but at the same time we must honor the old ones, whatever they may be. And yes, feelings can get hurt, but we can all grasp that love has been the only motivation here.
Just like from me to you.
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